We know traveling is an exhausting process and that comfort usually triumphs fashion when it comes to choosing what you pack. But you can have both! Remember that you not only represent your country (as you may be one of the only people from your country that others come across), but you’re also representing your dignity and self-respect on how you want people to approach you and treat you. Don’t embarrass yourself. Currently, the following rules are fashion faux-paus yet “ugly tourists” violate them all the time, and are thereby defined by these hideous pieces of clothing when traveling.
Dislaimer: Chances are that if you’re visiting this website, you aren’t a basic bitch, but we all have basic tendencies. Below are the 10 items that make you look like basic af. Just try to do better, fam. And if none of these apply to you, haaaaaayyy, werk!
What Not To Wear While Traveling #1: Chacos
Seriously, my grandmother doesn’t even wear these. They’re also only sold in one part of the world so you know, you’re screaming “I’M BASIC” to everyone around you. It doesn’t matter what color. Just stop.
And don’t you dare replace them with Crocs. Oh Lawd Jesus help us.
What Not To Wear While Traveling #2: Head to toe Grandpa-Swag
Oh yea buddy, you are DEF gonna be charged extra with this outfit on. Acid wash jeans, aloha shirts, bucket hats, socks with sandals, white socks with white tennis shoes and a camera around your neck… I’m taxing dat ass with a tourist tax cause I know you can afford it. But don’t walk next to me.
What Not To Wear While Traveling #3: Frat Gear
Anything with your frat or your university or any neon letters or anything matching. Like what were you thinking. Of all the things you wanted to greet this beautiful landscape with, it’s that?
What Not To Wear While Traveling #4: Fanny packs
I’m not sure why I have to say this, but no.
What Not To Wear While Traveling #5: Homeless swag
Go anywhere in Southeast Asia and you’ll find what I’m talking about. If you see a person whose dress look like a potato sack, is completely shapeless, and looks like they haven’t washed it in years. OR they have hemp bracelets around their ankles and wrists, with unwashed sun bleached hair and the same over-sized shirt you’ve been wearing for days, this is called the BEG-PACKER uniform. What is a beg-packer you ask? They’re those irresponsible travers who go around to other countries with no money then beg people on the streets to get to their next destination. But really, they have trust funds at home and are a disgrace to humanity.
And if they’re not a beg-packer, well, I know back-packing is rough but damn, that’s the outfit you chose to wear everyday?
What Not To Wear While Traveling #6: Nike Running Shorts
I’m not sure why anyone buys these shorts in the first place. Pants should not make you look flat in both the front and the back. Sporty wear is definitely necessary, but your butt deserves better.
What Not To Wear While Traveling #7: Big straw sun hats
These only look good in theory on pre-arranged pictures on the blog. In practice, they’re way too big to carry around and you’re definitely screaming “TOURIST” to everyone around you.
What Not To Wear #8: Bathing Suits That Encourage Body Shaming
Many of us grew up with bathing suit fears. Showing too much skin. Not having the “right” body. Well listen. Those are colonized Puritan ideas. We’re grown and can get rid of those now. Hike those shorts up, let me see dem thiiiiighs. Full coverage bottoms make you look like you have grandma saggy butt so don’t be afraid to show off everything you got! Brazilians, micro-kinis, no kini, whatever makes YOU feel most free! Countries around the world have long since embraced this idea so you may find yourself wanting to wear a little less.
On the other hand, maybe you want to fully cover your body and you feel beautiful that way. That’s great, too! Really it is whatever YOU feel most comfortable in.
*Note: some countries do have a bathing suit dress code, so do your research before packing.
What Not To Wear While Traveling #9: Rolling suitcases
Ugh, you are those people who take up all the space in the overhead bin. Who take up the space of three people while walking and pulling that thing behind you. Who run over people’s feet, who aren’t aware of your surroundings, who struggle to hop off trains and into cars. It’s so selfish.
And if you have a rolling suitcase WITH brand names on them.
What Not To Wear While Traveling #10: Honestly, wear whatever you want.
We don’t pay your bills so feel free to do you. Our silent judgement doesn’t even matter and ignore this entire post.
About The Author
Kiona is not an expert in fashion nor does she genuinely care what you wear. Don’t take her seriously.